Doing it.

Yes, this post is actually about sex and is not titled thusly as some subtle Sex and the City reference.

I have a problem that I think needs addressing, and it concerns sex.

Specifically, sex as a qualifier for any relationship that has lasted for a certain amount of time.

People my age seem to believe that two people who date for a certain (extensive) amount of time NEED to have sex. They feel very strongly about this (as is seen by my use of caps lock and the word "need" and not something floatier like the word "should"). And it bothers me, okay?

Just because two people have been dating for over a year doesn't mean they need to have sex. Yes, I understand you are only in high school and since you're a mildly privileged white suburbanite you feel as though you have little to talk about and so when two people have sex it gives you a little something extra to talk about. Yes, I understand that gossip is like crack to (most) teenage girls. Yes, I am a little angry right now and it's causing my tone to be slightly snippy (get-off-my-back-okay),

But, honestly? (Let me break this down for you.) Sex is not the end-all be-all of a relationship. Sex doesn't have to be some culminating exercise, like a final exam (albeit, I've heard it's more enjoyable.) Losing your virginity isn't some make-it-or-break it deal, like the media makes it out to be, either. Essentially, what two people do together is none of your business! As long as they're happy and communicating, you shouldn't care about what they do. Additionally, sex is not everything in a relationship! People can have a perfectly happy and healthy relationship and still not be ready to have sex.

So, (concluding note.) Please, please please PLEASE do not go along with the crowd, or maybe just that one loud and overly opinionated girl, and agree that two people should have sex if they've been dating for a long time. PLEASE formulate your own opinion on the matter. Mine is that two people should have sex when they're ready. And have a fuckin' awesome time doing it.

I Overdid It. Did I?

The author would like to apologize in advance for her use of italics, caps lock, and punctuation that lends this blog entry to sound like an article from Seventeen Magazine.

Ouch. It's happened to all of us: feeling a little bold with your crush one night, you send an overzealous text and get no reply. Your heart drops into your stomach and starts thumping wildly, your palms get a little sweaty (okay, maybe that's just me) and you panic. Cue the chirping crickets and awkward turtles.

A million thoughts, seemingly all punctuated by exclamation points, race through your head-

WHY hasn't he texted me back!

WHY THE EFF did I send that text!!

and the big kahuna-

DOES HE STILL LIKE ME!!!

After a minute that feels like an hour you begin to calm yourself down. Maybe he went out to walk his dog. Maybe he's working really hard on a history project. Maybe he got in a car accident. OMFG WHAT IF HE GOT IN A CAR ACCIDENT??

Granted, not everyone passes through the 9 stages of text grief (some have been known to make the car accident assumption straightaway). But for those who do, there is hope: you are not crazy! You are merely a teenage girl (or boy, no judgement) struggling with the limitless opportunities technology presents for communication.

Remember AIM? Remember logging on at exactly 5 o'clock so you could chat with your ~crush~? Love was so much easier then. Nowadays we've got to grapple with texting etiquette that has a whole new set of rules. And I have no idea what they are! If I did, I would not be writing this blog post. I would be enjoying some quality texting. Which brings me to my next topic~

GAMES PEOPLE PLAY (yes, I do know this is the title of a Sex and the City episode, NO JUDGEMENT, GOD.) In a relationship (or a "thing", or a friendship, or whatever), is it necessary to play games? Or do the complexities of getting to know another person cause problem enough that playing games only makes things more difficult? Right now, I'm going with the latter. Schedules rarely align, so why make it seem like you're more busy than you actually are? To seem more desirable? That's just stupid.

In the same vein of thought, I think that if you want to text someone you should do it. Shut off the nagging little voice in your head that worries about the text they never responded to and go for it. Give 'em hell, kid.