Soul Mates, Destiny - the "Real Connection"

While trying to sleep last night I turned over the concept of DESTINY in my brain while simultaneously trying to decide if it was too late to ask others what they thought on the subject. The morning after, and I'm too lazy to grab my phone but still thinking about destiny.

Destiny. Does it really exist, or is it just some concept mentally placed on a dusty shelf next to 50's-era repression of women?

I thought about soul mates, and how they're related to destiny. What makes someone your soul mate, and what if you have more than one? In my entire, extremely looonnggg life (har har), I've only felt a "Real Connection" with two people.

Real Connection (n): A feeling experienced when one encounters or thinks of another person. This feeling includes thoughts that the normal bullshit of everyday life truly doesn't matter, and that just being with this person would make you happy.

Let us examine these two men, eh?

1: I've known this dude for half of my life, and fell in love with him the instant I saw him. Cheesy, yeah, but you're talking to a girl who's pretty much seen every Molly Ringwald movie ever made. He can be a total douchebag, but he's always there for me when I need him, and he never brings the bullshit. Just being around him makes me happy, and I've always been strangely drawn to him. We've had a strange relationship, but I know that I can talk to him about anything and he won't freak out.

2: Truth be told, I was only close to this man for a couple of months before life inevitably had its way and split us up. The most profound thing I can say about this guy is that being with him made me feel like I was showing the world the best version of myself. And, really, isn't that what love is? A person who helps you be the best human being you could possibly be? I always felt like it was okay to be myself around him.

Some fresh perspective on the subject- I just asked a couple of friends if they believe in destiny, and soulmates. We've all agreed that we've felt inexplicable connections with people and that they happen all the time. From what I've gathered, most people believe in destiny. Lets meet the subjects...

...starting with those who believe. J- He doesn't know much about destiny and tries not to think about it, instead doing what feels good. He believes in soulmates, but that you can have more than one. J shared with me that these "real connections" I wrote about happen sometimes to him as well.

H- She thinks that no matter how many mistakes you make, you'll stay on the same path towards your destiny. Feels that when "connections" occur, its the greatest feeling in the world.

S- Believes that if something is meant to happen, it will happen.

... and those who don't. K- Doesn't believe in soulmates or destiny. His explanation? Life would be pointless if everything was already set in stone, and if destiny existed, your life would be an ongoing circle. And me? I'm not exactly sure of what I believe. I love the idea that someone perfect for you is out there, but it can be a little hard to deal with. What if you never find him? Hence, having more than one soulmate.

And what have I found out about the "real connection"? Regardless of whether the other person felt it indefinitely, it still could have been there. Therefore, the "connection" exists in varying degrees. If you feel it, but lose touch with the person you feel the connection with, it just exists on a smaller scale.

And there ya have it. Soul Mates, Destiny... the "Real Connection". Everyone's felt it. It's just a matter of what you believe.

Sex and the Short Haircut.

After reading a thought-provoking article on the power of a short haircut on sexual attraction, I started to ponder the issue myself. I learned that most men find a closer cut less attractive. But why? A shorter haircut showcases the wearers features and makes the eyes appear larger. Bobs and the like are associated with a fearless attitude and an overall air of chicness. I started thinking about famous women who have sported cropped ‘dos.

Marilyn Monroe, arguably the greatest sex symbol of all time, wore her short blonde curls and still had men pining after her. And who can forget Audrey Hepburn’s magical and nearly identical transformations in both Roman Holiday and Sabrina? In both films, she gains an adorable cropped cut along with an attitude adjustment and a handful of male admirers. Her affairs with multiple men only seems to turn my thesis on its head. Twiggy started a revolution. Miranda Hobbes, of Sex and the City, never takes her hair beyond chin level yet manages to keep up with her girlfriends in the bedhopping department. But does this non-relationship between hair length and sexual attraction only exist in Hollywood? I, personally, know of no men who find a woman with short hair attractive. Yet these short-haired women still live among us, finding boyfriends and receiving compliments.

Which brings me to Sex and the Short Cut, part deux. I now bring you to the dark side of short haircuts, those sported by soccer moms and middle-aged women alike. I see these women wearing sandals designed solely for comfort, browsing the sale racks at Target. They sport short cuts because they lack the time necessary to maintain a fuller mane. But what does this insinuate? Once you’re married and hit 40- sorry folks, thats it?

Will we be so conditioned to our stable suburban marriages that we stop trying and take a shorter, more unfortunate crop as part of the package? Lets hope not, because everyone knows that the second you let go of maintaining appearances and a crack forms in the cement of your marriage, a desperate twenty-something squeezes in.

In closing, I present you with no answers. Spending an hour of my allotted “exercise time” to dissect the connection between short hair and sexual attraction has left me with the same question as when I started- to chop or not to chop?